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"There are opportunities for conversations in general about the importance of pleasure. Maybe it’s a TV commercial or a show you’re watching together, or a song you’re listening to," she notes. "We don’t want to embarrass our kids, and truth be told, if a teenage girl has a vibrator and understands pleasure and it’s important to her, that’s not a bad thing," she says.

The suction cup base, which is also harness-compatible, is super secure, so you can attach it almost anywhere—the floor, a chair, the shower wall. It’s also completely waterproof (I’ve had this thing in the shower more times than I can count, and it still works flawlessly). You can use the suction and vibration functions independently or combine them for extra oomph. There are five suction intensities and five vibration patterns, so there’s a ton of combinations to play with. Each shaft has 10 vibrating speeds, and the bulbous, textured heads make it perfect for internal and external stimulation.

Unlike the Womanizer Classic, which is widest toward the nozzle and has a narrow handle, the Aer has a narrow head that allows it to slip easily between the labia for positioning against the clitoris. This sleek, angled shape also makes the toy convenient to use for clitoral stimulation during intercourse, as it doesn’t take up a lot of space. Because pleasure is highly subjective, our testers couldn’t possibly represent the needs and preferences of every person who may enjoy using a vibrator. If a toy was rechargeable, versatile, durable, waterproof, easy to clean, or covered by a solid warranty, we considered those attributes to be bonuses. Many people said they also desired an aesthetically pleasing toy with multiple color options. I’m a full-time writer and sex educator who has tested more than 200 different sex toys in the past 25 years.

Sex toys also make exotic gifts for your partner – and can open both of you up to new possibilities when you experiment with them together. Jung-sook seeks work to supplement her family’s income, to buy her son a new backpack for school, but plenty of companies won’t hire a married woman. That’s when she notices an ad for selling lingerie and sex toys, which in 1992 rural Korea is still considered quite risqué. She’s normally a little prudish and doesn’t care for dirty jokes.

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